How to Finally Build The Habit of Showing Up Consistently

Struggling to stay on track? Read This!

“Consistency is key.” — the most common advice on any possible topic online.

Every guru and expert tells you that you have to be more consistent. You’re consistently informed that consistency is crucial to success. Unfortunately, you consistently struggle with staying consistent when trying something new.

Here’s what you can do if you struggle with consistency and showing up when trying to build a new habit…

Why does showing up consistently feel impossible?

The last article went into detail on self-discipline, but the other piece of the equation for getting things done is consistency. Staying consistent enough to get the desired results is the most challenging aspect of building a habit or pursuing any goal until the end. Anyone can be excited at the beginning stages, but that motivation can quickly turn to disappointment.

For example, I always take my Spanish lessons seriously before a trip to a destination where I know I’ll get plenty of practice. Then when I arrive, I’m usually excited to engage in small talk with locals until I realize that I’m not fluent and have a long way to go. Then I start to feel discouraged, and putting myself out there constantly gets embarrassing. I know consistency is essential, but after saying the wrong word in a conversation for the 8th day, it’s normal to feel exhausted and fed up.

Here’s why staying consistent can feel impossible sometimes…

Issue #1: Consistency isn’t easy.

It’s tough to build an audience, get abs, or become decent at tennis if you’re not consistent and focused. Learning a new language is impossible if you do lessons when you’re occasionally motivated. The truth is that consistency is easy to talk about but difficult to apply in the long run when obstacles get in the way or boredom sets in.

Issue #2: You have to embrace sucking at something new.

It’s discouraging when you have to suck at something new. One of the biggest issues with trying to be consistent is that it’s not all that fun when you’re just starting and it feels like everyone else is ahead of you.

There’s no way to sugarcoat this:

Most of us aren’t naturals and the first few weeks or months of trying a new hobby or pursing any goal are going to absolutely suck at times. If you’re unwilling to go through this period, it won't be easy to be consistent.

Issue #3: You try to be consistent with 10 different goals.

Many of us struggle with consistency because we try to do too many things at once. When you try to be consistent with too many things at once, you end up not sticking to anything. We’re all guilty of this. We want to learn another language, get abs, run a marathon, and learn a new instrument all while trying to juggle work and real-life responsibilities.

“Refuse almost everything. Do almost nothing. But the things you do, do them all the way.” — Derek Siver

You can’t do everything at once. You set yourself up for failure when you agree to everything. Before you read the rest of this article, you have to agree that you won’t pursue 15 different challenges simultaneously.

Check out my previous article on what to do when motivation fades.

How do you build the habit of showing up?

Here’s how I do my best to show up consistently when trying to take on a new challenge…

Set small goals for the day. 

“While small might not be sexy, it is successful and sustainable. When it comes to most life changes that people want to make, big bold moves actually don’t work as well as small stealthy ones. Applying go big or go home to everything you do is a recipe for self-criticism and disappointment.” — BJ Fogg, “Tiny Habits.”

When you’re starting, the goal should be to get traction by setting realistic daily (or weekly) targets so you don’t feel overwhelmed.

You can’t expect to go viral with your first Instagram reel, become fluent after one Spanish lesson, or lose 20lbs by training occasionally. You want to set small targets that will make it easy to reach your bigger goals in the long run (anything worth accomplishing takes time!).

Why do small targets work?

• You can stick to them.

• You don’t feel stressed out.

• You have time.

• You’re not lying to yourself.

• You can eventually do more when you’re ready.

Never miss twice in a row.

“The first mistake is never the one that ruins you. It is the spiral of repeated mistakes that follows. Missing once is an accident. Missing twice is the start of a new habit.

This is a distinguishing feature between winners and losers. Anyone can have a bad performance, a bad workout, or a bad day at work. But when successful people fail, they rebound quickly. The breaking of a habit doesn’t matter if the reclaiming of it is fast.” — James Clear, “Atomic Habits: Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results.”

The biggest issue for most people is that they let one bad day turn into a bad week. Life happens, and things get in the way. This is to be expected. You’re going to face many challenges and obstacles. It won’t always be smooth sailing. If you miss a day, it happens and it’s okay.

Just try not to miss twice. Get back on track immediately so you don’t fall off with consistency. It won’t always be easy, but you can’t beat yourself up because you ate too much over the weekend or missed a workout. The goal is always progress over perfection.

Hold yourself accountable for sticking to this.

“If you’re not winning, if you’re going to bed every night and waking up the next day hoping things will be better, if you’re spending more time creating a false image of yourself as a winner than investing in ways to stop being a loser, it’s time to drink up the truth. It will have a very bitter taste, but it will be worth it.

Because there’s a long race ahead of you with no end in sight.” — Tim S. Grover, “Winning.”

You have to be held accountable to ensure you’ll stick to this and be consistent because nobody wants to look like a failure or a quitter. The trick is to have some stakes so you can’t just give up and call it quits as soon as you get slightly bored.

How can you hold yourself accountable?

• The easiest way is to make your goals public. I learned that putting stuff out on social media means that you have to follow up on it. While I don’t want you to become another announcement maker, it does help to let your intentions be known so that you’re held accountable.

• Make a bet or have a challenge. Challenge your friends or have some sort of a bet so that you have a reason to see this goal through.

If you’re not ready for that, try this…

Hire a coach or join a mastermind group.

You have to be held accountable by someone you don’t want to disappoint. There have to be consequences for your inactions. If you want to be consistent, you have to spend some money on this goal because a check separates a conversation from a commitment.

There’s nothing more annoying than someone who doesn’t do what they said they were going to do. It’s so awkward. They spend so much time talking about their big plans and then they just come up with excuses.

This is where masterminds and coaching come into play. Let’s break these down:

• Masterminds. The basic premise is that you find a group of people around your same level to bounce ideas off. You check in once a week and push each other. When you have a group of people holding you accountable, you’re more likely to stay consistent. This automatically happens in some group gym sessions (CrossFit) and MMA-style training.

• Coaching. If you absolutely want to force yourself to be consistent, you’ll want to spend the money on coaching so that you can’t bail when you’re not feeling motivated. Investing in a coach is the easiest way to stay consistent because you have to report to someone about your progress.

You’ll want to read up on why your environment is the secret ingredient in getting results.

Remove the noise and distractions stopping you.

“Think of all the interests vying for a share of your wallet or for a second of your attention. Food scientists are engineering products to exploit your taste buds. Silicon Valley engineers are designing applications as addictive as gambling. The media is manufacturing stories to provoke outrage and anger.

These are just a small slice of the temptations and forces acting on us—distracting us and pulling us away from the things that truly matter. “ — Ryan Holiday, “The Daily Stoic.”

You have to set non-negotiable items and remove the noise. We recently looked at how you can destroy distractions. I won’t be a hypocrite here because I’m still working on this.

Here are some easy things you can work on cutting out to get more done: video games, watching every serial killer documentary, doom scrolling, arguing with people on social media, watching the news, and responding to everything you see online.

You would be shocked by how much free time you have when you don’t argue with strangers on social media or spend the day doomscrolling.

Find any progress you can to celebrate.

“Research has shown that of all forms of human motivation the most effective one is progress. Why? Because a small, concrete win creates momentum and affirms our faith in our further success.” — Greg Mckeown, “Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less.”

If you want to keep on showing up and remain consistent, you need to see some progress. Feeling like there isn’t any noticeable progress is the main reason that people will give up on something.

Here’s how you can find progress:

• Compare yourself to day one when you first started.

• Record yourself or take photos to see how much you’ve improved.

• Ask for feedback from people you respect.

• Track and measure how you’re doing.

You’ll want to stay consistent when you see progress because it feels like you’re on the right track.

How to be consistent about consistency:

• Set small daily targets that you can realistically reach.

• Never miss twice.

• Hold yourself accountable.

• Hire a coach or join a mastermind.

• Remove the noise.

• Celebrate your progress.